Sacred Flesh: Honouring the Body’s Wisdom Beyond Appearance

The intricate workings of our mind-body system such as the seamless connections between our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual selves, are simply remarkable. We are incredible feats of nature and Spirit but have become indifferent towards our bodies’ functionality. Society has conditioned all of us to believe that our bodies hold value only if they conform to certain standards of appearance. 

For women especially, this conditioning severs us from the intuitive, feminine knowing that lives in the pelvis and womb space. When the yoni becomes something to judge or hide instead of a centre of wisdom and creation, we lose access to a profound source of power.

We are constantly bombarded with messages about the "right" size, shape, color and even hair distribution. Consequently, we feel deep shame and dissatisfaction with our bodies, which prevents us from fully engaging in life's experiences. 

For many people who struggle with body image, shame toward our bodies manifests in various destructive ways which are exacerbated by diet culture. Some of us resort to camouflage, hiding our bodies and concealing the parts we deem imperfect, essentially erasing ourselves. Others choose to avoid situations that draw attention to our bodies, missing out on important events and opportunities. 

For a few of us, we become obsessed with controlling our appearance, spending excessive amounts of time, energy and money on diets, exercise regimens and cosmetic procedures. And there are those of us who constantly judge ourselves and others, measuring our worth against societal standards. These manifestations not only hinder our ability to live authentically but also perpetuate a harmful cycle.

When we disconnect from our bodies in these ways, we lose connection to the feminine qualities of intuition, receptivity, sensuality, and inner authority. The very traits that thrive through the yoni—creativity, pleasure, and deeper emotional knowing—become muted.

The body positivity movement has reasserted itself as a powerful force over the last couple of decades. It challenges the damaging messages of the diet and fitness industry and promotes acceptance of diverse bodies.

It encourages us to embrace our bodies, including their so-called imperfections, and to reframe them as beautiful. The movement strives to reclaim the narrative and redefine what is considered acceptable and desirable.

Body positivity emerged as a necessary response to the harmful messages spread by diet culture. It is a worthy goal that has brought attention to the importance of self-love and body acceptance.

However, the movement has at times swung too far in the opposite direction, creating an environment where body acceptance overrides our own authentic needs and desires. Some body positivity spaces even discourage deliberate fat loss, seeing it as giving in to societal pressure. This overlooks the lived experience of many women who find that moving through the world in a bigger body comes with real challenges.

And herein lies an important limitation.

Both extreme forms of diet culture and the body positivity movement prevent us from exercising agency over our own feelings and choices regarding our bodies. For true body love to be cultivated, it is essential to recognize that we have the right to decide how we feel about our bodies, free from guilt, obligation or external moral judgments. 

And for those of us, particularly from marginalized groups, who have difficulty truly seeing our bodies in a positive light, there can be immense relief in knowing that we are not failing at yet another thing if body positivity doesn’t feel available to us in the way that it’s promoted in the media. Years of socialized conditioning doesn’t easily fall away because body positivity influencers tell us it should.

Another approach named body neutrality offers a different perspective. 

Body neutrality aims to separate our self-worth from our physical appearance. It says that we are so much more than our bodies and encourages us to focus on deriving our self-esteem from areas that have little or nothing to do with our bodies. 

Body neutrality shifts our focus from superficial appearance-based judgments to a more holistic and empowering approach, so we can nurture self-love, focus on personal growth, and make choices aligned with our true desires. 

Instead of placing so much emphasis on how we look, body neutrality invites us to shift our focus away from the body completely and onto our gifts, skills, character and higher self.

And herein we find another limitation.

Our bodies are not just ornaments. 

They are vessels of experience, capable of extraordinary feats. They hold memories, feelings and stories.

Our bodies allow us to breathe, move, create and connect with others. Our bodies experience pleasure, pain and a vast array of emotions. 

Being in our bodies involves not only somatic and sensory sensations, but also emotional experiences that make our human experience whole. 

The pelvis and yoni especially hold an ancient intelligence. They are places where intuition rises, where we sense boundaries, where pleasure originates, and where stored emotions often speak first. When we remain neutral or detached, we miss these messages.

Hillary L. McBride, a renowned therapist and researcher, advocates a more holistic approach. McBride acknowledges that body positivity can be a transformative goal if we shift our focus from appearance to the incredible functionality of our bodies. 

For women, honouring functionality includes honouring the cyclical, intuitive, and deeply creative nature of the female body. The yoni is not simply anatomy—it is a living symbol of renewal, connection, and life force.

In redirecting our attention to the intricate workings of our mind-body system, we begin to appreciate the multitude of experiences and sensations that arise from being embodied. 

McBride emphasizes that body positivity remains a valuable goal when combined with an appearance-neutral perspective.

From an appearance-neutral standpoint, we can shift our focus from how our bodies look to how they function and the incredible intuitive wisdom available in the sensations they provide us. 

For many women, neutrality toward the aesthetic qualities of one’s body can actually be an invitation back into the yoni, the root of our feminine embodiment, because it removes appearance from the equation and lets us feel what is actually happening inside our bodies.

McBride encourages us to explore the somatic and emotional landscape of our bodies, acknowledging and embracing the full range of experiences they offer. 

This holistic approach allows us to develop a deeper connection with ourselves and cultivate a healthier relationship with our bodies. We can develop our passions, skills, and relationships and appreciate the extraordinary gift of being alive in our bodies.

It is time to move beyond the narrow confines of societal beauty standards and embrace a holistic approach to body image.  Practising embodiment and growing our capacity for the felt sense of our lived experience becomes a natural doorway into an honouring and acceptance that is genuine and sustaining. 

As we return to the body, we also return to the feminine—our softness, our cycles, our sensuality and the deep wisdom of the yoni. We can reframe the power of body positivity while cultivating a deep sense of self-compassion and appreciation for our bodies.

This is not just about self-image; it is about reclaiming our sovereignty as women who inhabit our bodies fully and without apology.